What the Hell?

Revolution, as defined by the Oxford Dictionary, is a dramatic and wide-reaching change in the way something works or is organized or in people's ideas about it.

America, I would like to welcome you to your modern day revolution. Now, this election cycle feels like an awakening of mankind. I am surrounded by many well informed and passionate youth voters. Many of which, I believe will become very prevalent politically in the future. Many of share a common affection for a certain Bernard Sanders. (Who I just learned does NOT have a middle name. You're welcome.) It should be noted that some others do believe that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer and that Deez Nuts is a viable candidate. 

Could my excitement be because this is my first time really being involved? Sure. However, I really believe that there is some magic in the air. (Good and Evil.)
The evil all began on June 16, 2015. (The day Republican front-runner Donald Trump announced his run for office.) No, I am not calling Donald Trump evil; I am calling him a racist. His rhetoric has done two main things:

1. Expose hate and
2. Encourage violance.

Believe it or not, Trump is playing a key part in this epic revolution. 

Before I really delve into this I would like to note my theory - I firmly believe that Trump doesn't believe a damn word that he says. He has to be more intelligent than he is letting on. Donald Trump attended the University of Pennsylvania and built an empire. Both of which can be debated and flawed but somewhere along the way Trump had to have picked up something. Numerous times in the past, he has been quoted saying that if he ever ran for office he would run as a Republican because 'they are all idiots.' He has also been close friends with Hillary Clinton for several years and donated funds to her previous campaigns. To me, it makes since that he would run to divide the Republican party and hand the election to the Democrats.

Think about it, it would be a brilliant scheme. Months ago, it appeared that Hillary Clinton would be the Democratic nominee, and what better way to endorse her than to hand her the election? There are a lot of  'what if's in the situation, but I buy it.

Anyway, when Trump gets on stage he stirs something up in people. Something.. menacing. The problem isn't Trump himself. For, he is just one man. What scares me is his following. Even if he does not truly believes the words that come out of his mouth, to think that so many people actually do believe in the hate he speaks breaks my heart.

America, where is your compassion?

Potentially, and hopefully, in canidate Bernie Sanders. This man has spent his entire life fighting for social justice and change. (Something that Hillary Clinton has actually been trying out recently?) He is an authentic candidate and the only true anti-Trump I see. He does not avoid the issues or politizise his way through a conversation. Instead, he is honest with the voters about what he believes in. Bernie's record shows him time and time again supproting equal rights and treatment of all people. It shows him fighting for our planet and crusaiding agasint campaign finance corruption.

(Hell, this man is so against political greed that he flies in coach.)

Bernie is authentic. Bernie is good. I like Bernie.


Bernie has fired up both me and my peers. I have talked with many coming-of-age voters who claim that they are only interested in the voting process because they have the opportunity to vote for a "legend." Bernie lit a fire, and now it is time to let America #bern.

(MISSOURI VOTERS: Please make sure you show up at the polls this Tuesday! Make your voice heard and let's fuel this revolution.)

Cancel Christmas (In My Life)

I am an atheist.
Simple.
There is no one that I owe an explanation or apology to for that.

I also do not owe anyone an explanation or an apology for my refusal to participate in Christmas.
However, I'll totally explain. (Though, in no way will I attempt to apologize for it, sorry.)

First off, holidays are silly. Time is labeled by man. To celebrate a day because of a previous event on that day years ago seems... strange, to me. Thanksgiving only represents giving thanks, and in no way does it for us. Valentines Day is a day that represents giving love. However, I think that these are elements that we should carry with us into our daily lives. Every day is what you make it, and I choose to live every day as thanksgiving. (Pass the green bean casserole, please.) Therefore, the novelty of a holiday has worn off for me.

Next, Christmas-in particular-carries no weight for me. I am an atheist.  At the end of the day, Christmas is a Christian holiday. I have no desire to celebrate the 'birth of Christ' and stuff. Are Catholics expected to celebrate Hanukkah? No? So... why would an Atheist be expected to celebrate Christmas? Even my fellow Atheists have condemned me for my refusal to participate.

How I spend December 25th is my business. I won't be offended when someone tells "Merry Christmas." I won't be offended when someone tells me "Happy Hanukkah." I won't be offended when someone doesn't pass on a standard holiday greeting. None of these people have a malice intent and instead or just trying to wish me well or be on their way. I appreciate that.

However, I don't appreciate being told that I'm wrong and should celebrate anyway. Someone once tried telling me that I should celebrate it because it was an excuse to wear pajamas and eat cookies and stuff. No?

1. I no longer try to make excuses for why I live in my pajamas.
2. Now, I hardcore enjoy these and wish they were around all of the time. But snowman cookies ≠ Christmas. (Snowman cookies > Christmas.)


With all of that said, if you are an atheist and want to celebrate Christmas... DO IT. Every day on this earth is worth celebrating. Sometimes it takes cookies and elves to help realize that.

Peace, joy, giving, and love are all wonderful things. However, there is nothing binding them to December 25th. I encourage those reading this to focus on living life like every day were Christmas. Enjoy whatever holiday it is that you are celebrating, or simply enjoy your day. In the words of my idol, Ellen DeGeneres, "Be kind to one another."

If I Were a Boy

I can only imagine how difficult it is to be a parent. Obviously, you'd have dreams for your kid/s. You'd want for them to be successful. You'd want them to be happy. I mean, you'd love them. What I don't understand is when parents put a limitation on that love. Over the past several years, I have seen a handful of my personal friends 'disowned' by their family because of their sexual orientation or gender identity. I have seen students go homeless and hungry while they wait on their parents to take them back.

That is not okay.

To all of the parents reading this, why? Why would you ever want your child to be completely alone? On September 3, 2014, Rolling Stone reported saying that there are between 320,000 and 400,000 homeless LGBTQ+ youth in the United States. 40% of these children choose to leave because of rejection. The parents who choose to punish their children for their sexuality instead of embracing them honestly disgust me. Pushing your children away push them into this abyss of despair. 

The saddest thing, to me, is the suffocation approach that many parents take. By never letting your child leave the home or talk to friends you are ruining every ounce of your relationship with them. When they are 18, and can finally dictate their life completely, you will be the people they choose to avoid. I understand that you want your child to be a certain way. But ultimately, you can't control every detail about them. Ultimately, if your child is safe and happy... isn't that all that matters?

Take this, for example, which would you rather have your daughter date?

Male	Female
17	17
70% attendance rate	97% attendance rate
Tries to sleep with her	Loves to speak with her
Parties on the weekend	Works on the weekend
Might someday move out of parents house	Planning on going to an Ivy League University
Kind of likes her	ADORES her
Thinks she is hot	Thinks that she is beautiful in every possible way.

 

If you choose the first person because they are a male, you have the point of being a parent all wrong. 

Personally, I don't want to have kids at all. If I did, though, I would want them to be with whoever makes them happy. I would do everything in my power to make sure they felt safe.

"But this is a Christian family and we will NOT have a queer living under this roof!"

1. Please, read this right now.

2. Your child is not gay OR Christian. Your child is whatever THEY identify themselves as. They are no different than they were before you knew this one small part of them.

3. Fine, send them to my house. If you are going to treat your child like dirt than it is you who does not deserve them. There is not always a safe alternative for them to turn to, understand that. However, if you are in this situation and anywhere near me... I am not kidding. My couch is very open and would love to have you on it. No one deserves to be afraid of their home. 

If you are in this situation or know someone who is, please use the following resources:

• Trevor Helpline Toll-free: 866.4.U.TREVOR (866.488.7386)Hours: Seven days a wekk, 24 hours a day National suicide and crisis counseling for lesbian and gay youth. Local resource referrals available.
• GLBT National Youth Talkline 800-246-PRIDE (1-800-246-7743) Hours: Monday-Saturday 9:30pm to Midnight, Eastern time Peer support and resources for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, queer, and questioning youth.
• CDC National STD and AIDS Hotline Toll-free: (800) 342-AIDS or (800) AIDS-TTY Hours: Seven days a week, 24 hours a day
• GLBT (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender) National Hotline Toll-free: (888) THE-GLNH, (888) 843-4564 Hours: Monday-Friday, 4:00P.M. to MIDNIGHT, and Saturday, Noon to 5:00P.M. Eastern Standard Time
• Linea Nacional del SIDA y ETS Toll-free: (800) 344-7432 Hours: Seven days a week, 8:00A.M. to 2:00P.M. Eastern Standard Time
• National Runaway Switchboard Toll-free (800) 621-4000 Hours: Seven days a week, 24 hours a day Hotline for runaway/homeless youth and their families.

 If you feel like you need more direct support feel free to contact me directly and I can help navigate through the next few phases. 

lindsayduede@gmail.com

Karen.

My faith in humanity was just awakened after what seems like eternal hibernation. Lounging around the front desk of the hotel I work at, I met a wonderful elderly women. (A women I had yet to learn the name of.) Whilst checking her in, she began telling me of her adventures at home. She claims she is nothing significant, just a measly Walmart employee. A few moments later she mentioned volunteering at the hospital because it MATTERS to her. As a fan of volunteer work, I commended her on her compassion for others. The world needs more people to step out and volunteer just to help. She stepped back from the counter and exited through the lobby doors. 

As I returned to my work, I glanced up to see her assisting a 92 year old women across the floor, smiling at me as they passed by. Later during the evening the original women, who I discovered is named Karen, returns to my desk. Immediately she begins the origin of her relationship with the 92 year old, Ms. Mary. 6 years ago the Ms. Mary was practically left widowed, causing her to be scared and alone. After just briefly meeting Karen, she began staying at her house. Now, 6 years later, they are best friends. This story may not come across as wonderful as it appears to me, but it really is.

So many of us live day to day treating the people we do know with spite out of comfort. This women treated a stranger with love and compassion, and has been rewarded because of it. The world needs more people like Karen.

A Huge Step _________.

On September 25th, 2015, the queer community will take a huge step. On this day, Centropolis Entertainment will release Stonewall. The IMDB page has a plot summary that reads, "A young man's political awakening and coming of age during the days and weeks leading up to the Stonewall Riots." Now, a lot of individuals are pissed about this movie. So, before I really get into this, I would like to address a few things. I am white and I am privileged. Of course I don't have the same insight and understand as a person of color. I also was not AT the Stonewall Riots in 1969. Everyone who is arguing over this movie is in a quite a few places of privilege, so I urge everyone to take a few steps back. Aggressive discussions won't do any good for anyone. So, try to understand where others are coming from. Even if someone has a view that you feel is daft or narrow-minded don't discredit them for it. Instead, hear them out and then explain your view. Otherwise you really won't get ANYWHERE with them.

Now, let's go over a few issues.

This film is whitewashed. 

This is something you don't even have to watch the movie to know, just look at the cast list. Nearly all of the credits go to cis-white individuals. (I'm not sure of the straight to queer ratio.) In reality, the majority of Stonewall Riot heroes were transgender women of color. So why is this movie so brazenly presenting a mostly Caucasian cast? Personally, I think all media needs to include more diversity - not JUST this movie. Hollywood is whitewashed, not just Stonewall. The root of this problem will not be addressed by getting upset at this one movie that is blatantly misrepresenting the true population at the riots. 

Get mad AT Hollywood. Demand to see more diversity on screen. I don't just mean to tell more stories of diversity, but to use PoC and queer actors/actresses in everyday story-lines. Give a love interest to a queer character without the only trait of the relationship being that it is queer. Focus on a transgender character without directing the entire show towards gender. Show people of color and Caucasians blending in society without FOCUSING on race. I say this not to take away from the obvious strains that comes with being diverse, but to HUMANIZE the population. We need to deconstruct the media's portrayal of the token queer or colored friend. We are MORE than our sexuality, gender identification, or skin color and it time that the world gets to see authentic queer  and colored characters. 

This film doesn't feature the TRUE Stonewall Heroes.

Going into this movie you should know that it is NOT a documentary. It is NOT historically perfect. However, I see this as an opportunity. The fact that this is historical-fiction allows us to have a much bigger conversation. When this movie is released, it will no doubt draw a lot of press. It is up the US to make sure that that press is used to educate people on the actual Stonewall Riots. Presently, they aren't taught in schools. In fact, unless you're a member of the queer community in one way or another... I doubt you even know much about them. (I'll provide educational links at the bottom of this page for those of you who are interested. I really hope you will take a moment to buff up your knowledge on the subject before attacking views either way.)

When this movie comes out, we need to give it as much attention as possible. Why? Because if we don't, no one will. Society will not receive this as the queer community rejecting a historically inaccurate movie. They will receive it as a movie over queer history failing in the box offices, so why make more? This movie WILL NOT BE PERFECT. But it is such a huge step for this community... Honestly, so few movies are made that focus on queer history. We have been all but erased. Now, we are penciling our way back in. Therefore, the notion to boycott this movie, while understandable, doesn't seem like a good idea to me. If this movie gets bad ratings and drops out of theaters than we lose our chance at voicing the truth. If we actually see the movie and then speak out about the discrepancies between it and reality, we will actually be heard. 

Don't get me wrong, I don't support the whitewashing. I HATE that it appears like the true heroes will barely appear in the movie, if at all. However, this is about so much more than just a movie; this is about our movement. We shouldn't 'settle' for a watered-down version of our truth, but we shouldn't fight a voice that is trying to help us. We should try to guide that voice down a better path and use this movie as a HUGE stepping stone towards drawing awareness towards all of these frustratingly real issues. Much like the HUGE uproar towards Caitlyn Jenner because of her privileges. Instead of arguing with all media attention the queer community needs to embrace the momentum and use it to spread positive awareness towards real issues. So, I will watch Stonewall, and I urge you to do the same. 

Just a few more notes ahead.

We ALL come from places of privilege in some aspect. None of us share the exact same background, so none of us should expect to have the same views. However, we should try to understand where we each are coming from. If you feel the need to boycott Stonewall, do it. You are every bit as justified as me. Just don't be hateful towards me or anyone else who will decide to watch the movie. Thus far, we all have only seen a two minute trailer. (Assuming that the reader of this has actually seen the trailer. If not, watch it here.) Hopefully, a lot of these issues will be ironed out in the actual movie. If not, hopefully the queer community will use it as an opportunity to speak out about the true events at Stonewall. 

Teaching queer history is SO important and it just doesn't happen right now. This is not meant to be an educational film, but it surely has potential to at least expose the mass population to the idea of Stonewall. I'm not settling for this, but I am thankful for this step forward on a much longer journey. 

For you to just peruse:
http://www.villagevoice.com/film/queens-of-the-night-what-really-happened-at-the-stonewall-inn-6393707
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/michael-lambert/stonewall-whitewashes-tra_b_7982208.html

Stop Me If You... No, Just Stop Me.

I. Am. SO. Tired.

With good reason, of course. Currently, I work two jobs and seven days a week; I volunteer on a few days as well. With the start of my senior year approaching rapidly, I take every opportunity to study or work on college applications. No matter how proactively I am using my time, the fact is, I am exhausted. Most people would ask for a day or two off, but I won't. I will spend every waking moment of mine consumed by activity.

Why? Society has turned me restless. (Yes, I'm blaming society for yet another issue. Maybe that is a sign that this community ought to step up its game.)

I mean, I have so much to do...
-Graduate high school
-Save money
-Find a way to pay for college tuition
-Get IN to a college
     -Make my resume 'spicy'
         -Join lots of clubs
              -Have leadership roles
         -Take advanced classes
              -PASS THE CLASSES
         -Score high on the ACT/SAT
              -Study for them NONSTOP
         -Write SO MANY ADMISSION ESSSAYS (plz make it end)
         -Show that I can work during the academic year
         -Get killer recommendations
               -Over extend myself for every teacher.
-Stay mentally sane
         -Fake it.


The list goes on and on. While yes, I put a lot of this pressure on myself, a prodigious amount comes from outside forces inculcating me with the fear of failure. The very idea of not being successful causes me to become aroused with panic. Therefore, I push myself (over a mental cliff).

I am nowhere near to the only kid stressing out over my future. In fact, USA Today reported that 27% of high school students have claimed extreme stress during the last school year. (55% claimed moderate stress.) So what is the root of why so many teens are stressing out?

From the moment that a child steps foot in school doors, they are placed in an overly competitive environment. It all starts with a gold star. During the first few years of schooling, teachers are commonly known to give out rewards to students who do something well; leaving students who preform average left out. Teachers look at this as motivation, students look at this as a competition. I was the student that would never be caught dead without the sticker by my name. It was embarrassing for students who did not receive one. Were they not as smart as their classmates? In elementary, the effects may seem harmless. However, when the mindset carries over into the student's life... it becomes a major problem.


"I have to be first in my class or I won't get into college!"
"If I don't get a 34 on my ACT than _________ has better chances of me at getting into _______ so I won't for sure!"
"A B?!? NOW I'LL NEVER GET INTO YALE!"-Blair Waldorf

You see my point? I'm all for being a high achiever. Yes, applying to colleges is incredibly stressful and competitive.

But it is not everything.

What really matters? Your mental health and your happiness matter so incredibly much. If you don't leave yourself time to sleep or just breath, then what good will any of your hard work do? Society has pit teenager versus teenager; and, it is time that we deconstruct that mindset. I can easily shine my brightest without worrying about how well everyone else is doing. In fact, I can probably shine brighter. I really do love everything that I do, but I am over-extending myself. I need to separate what I am doing for ME and what I am doing for a gold star.

We all get this one incredible life on Earth. Personally, I would rather spend mine enjoying every day instead of being consumed with stress. Parents, encourage your children to be THEIR best, not to worry when they're not the best. Children, don't only waste your youth consumed by thoughts of tomorrow. Remember to shake off the pressure society is placing on you, and decide for yourself who and where you want to be. 

She vs He: The Stigma.

I have approximately 18 drafts for posts that I would like to make. However, every time that I start writing on them... well.. I come up dry. The times that I am able to post something are the times that I feel the most passionate and sure of myself.

Right now, I am 100% sure that this post is necessary.

My whole life, I have lived in the confines of what society tells me is acceptable. Often, those rules are highlighted by my gender. Now, I think most people can agree that gender roles are not only sexist, but also ignorant. I'm not here to nag individuals that are stuck in the 1920's about their behavior. Instead, I'd like to point out the new, fresh form of subtle sexism.

Today, sitting on the gym at my High School, I engaged with one of my peers in a conversation about my sexuality. This is something that I have grown very comfortable in doing. I mean, if I wasn't confident enough to talk about myself to one person how could I expect to have an impact on the world? Anyway, at one point in the conversation this dude looks me dead in the eyes and says, "I mean... two girls together isn't like... as messed up as two guys together..." He continued to talk, but I had already tuned out. I would like to point out that he appeared to have good intentions and only said this after I assured him that he wouldn't offend me with whatever was on his mind.

Here is a (read as 'the') problem with that: 

For Girl + Girl > Boy + Boy to be true, than Girl > Boy must be true as well. 

As soon as he stopped talking, I presented that idea to him. I directly asked him what the difference between a cis-male and a cis-female was. Immediately, he began to name off physical characteristics. Finally, he was able to agree that men and women are EQUALS. I guess what I'm saying is this: I don't personally understand how you can believe that men and women are equal, yet condemn one more for doing the EXACT SAME THING. Not only is this obviously homophobic and sexist, but it is also VERY ignorant.

This is not even close to being the only conversation I've had along those lines. The idea of two women being together has perversely been turned into a fantasy for many. The thought of two guys kissing? Gross. Wrong. Sick.

Do you see the problem? 

Society needs to stop sexualizing women. 

I wish we could live in a world without regarding the skin color, sexual orientation, or gender expression of others. Obviously, that isn't going to happen anytime soon. That doesn't have to inhibit us from taking strides forward! I urge you to really think through the things you say. I'll be the first to admit that I often speak without thinking. It wasn't until a good friend of mine asked me a simple question, (why?) that I began to even question my way of thinking. I realized that it isn't my right to talk about something that I don't understand. I have certain privileges that I have received by just being born as who I am. (Ex.: I typically don't face racial slurs.) Everyone is privileged in one way or another. It is not my job to act like I'm not. However, it is my job to be accountable for not overstepping with my privilege. I can not use my voice to advocate for/against something that I have no true experience with.

It. Is. Not. My. Place.

This conversation with a straight-white-cis-male is a perfect example of privilege. Once again, I'm not opposed to discussing who I am or why I am that way. I am opposed to generalizing groups of people. I am also opposed to someone who can view one person doing ANYTHING as better or worse than another just because of their gender expression/sexual identification/skin color/ect..


I know that this post got kind of off topic in a few areas.

What I really hope you can take away from this is how important it is to really think about what you believe in and what you say. To speak from privilege is to speak blindly. Please make sure that there is basic logic behind whatever it is that you feel that you need to say. Humans are all equal. We are flesh and blood. You can't judge one without judging a much larger group.

*end rant*